


Yearning is Inherently Homosexual

by ElisaQuartz



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Everyone Loves Hinata, I dont have a beta soo, M/M, Pining Atsumu, Post-Time Skip, Pro Volleyball Player Miya Atsumu, Pro Volleyball Player Sakusa Kiyoomi, Yearning, and they were teammates (oh my god they were teammates), as they should - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-27
Updated: 2021-01-23
Packaged: 2021-03-10 00:07:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,238
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27744982
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ElisaQuartz/pseuds/ElisaQuartz
Summary: They’d been having a moment, Sakusa could almost admit. Atsumu had been genuine, and Kiyoomi’d responded in kind to get that stupid guilty, sad look off his face. Then, Atsumu had to ruin it by saying something so incredibly dumb. And inappropriate.Sakusa, in an attempt to completely avoid thinking about it, grabbed his novel from his bedside table, but not even that could distract him. After a few minutes, he resigned himself to his fate and clicked off his bedside lamp. He’d sleep this off, and stop thinking about the idea of kissing Miya Atsumu by morning.
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou, Miya Atsumu/Sakusa Kiyoomi
Comments: 10
Kudos: 86





	1. EVOO (extra virgin olive oil)

Sakusa sighed, sitting in a high barstool with his hands a careful distance from the undoubtedly grimey table. He’d wiped it down, but you could never be too sure. He asked himself how he ended up here, and pretended it wasn’t because of a recent phone call with Komori.

“You need to actually make friends, Kiyoomi. Do you even talk to anyone you went to college with?” 

“I talk to people. I talk to you.” They’d had this conversation a hundred times since high school, and it ended the same way every time. “I’m not really interested in anyone I went to college with. I’m fine.” In the end, Komori had sighed and asked him to think about it— the same song and dance every time. 

Except he’d had it in his head when Hinata had brightly asked “Omi-san, are you joining us for dinner after practice today?” 

He had successfully avoided the vast majority of Meian’s attempts to “bond,” politely declining any invitations to drink or eat after practice. He hadn’t been on the team for that long, but he’d say that he escapes about 75% of the time. 

Unfortunately, he’d been ambushed on two ends tonight. One was, of course, Komori’s entirely unnecessary nagging (Sakusa was fine on his own, was used to being on his own). The other, completely unexpected attack came in the form of one Hinata Shouyou. He’d stopped Sakusa immediately after his post practice-shower (his most agreeable), and grinned his question out. And Sakusa had crumbled immediately.

“Ah, sure Hinata,” he’d stumbled out before he even realized what he was saying. 

Because the thing is, he liked Hinata. He was nice, and despite being loud and overly energetic, was generally respectful and accepted all of Kiyoomi’s quirks without a pause. His first day at practice, he’d called Sakusa for a high five after a good spike, before quickly remembering his issues with germs and apologizing. He’d gone so far as to ask if he could sanitize his hands for a high five. Who goes that far for something as simple as high five, from someone as generally disagreeable as him? 

Hinata Shouyou, thats who. And, since he’d joined, he’d never mentioned a single one of Sakusa’s weird habits. Even well meaning people (re: Bokuto) had made a number of accidental off color comments. 

So, when the kid had asked if he’d join them, Sakusa had said yes without even realizing it. Thus, here he was, in a semi crowded izakaya with his extremely loud teammates, several of whom were certainly drinking too much. And being too loud. And annoying. 

“Hey hey, Omi-Omi, did you hear us?” Ah, there he is. The loudest, most annoying of them all. 

“No, I make a habit of tuning out annoying people, my bad Miya.” Atsumu squawked, before sending him another shit eating grin. 

“We’re talkin’ about our first kiss. Shouyou-kun here said he didn’t kiss anyone until Brazil.” Hinata blushed a bit, before laughing at the guys teasing him for his innocence. This was especially funny in knowing that Hinata was absolutely not innocent in Rio. There were rumors of Ninja Shouyou throughout the league, so he knew not to be fooled. Still, he blushes and grins bashfully.

“Ah, I just didn’t really care about all of that in High School, you know? I was more focused on volleyball.” Sakusa nodded sagely, because did understand. He was the same way, in university too. Not that Atsumu, who an idiot, would understand.  
“Ah, but then Shouyou-kun took Rio by storm.” Atsumu drawled, and Kiyoomi didn’t even try to suppress a grimace. How Atsumu managed to get on his nerves so consistently, he had no idea. Bokuto piped up from the end of the table.

“My first kiss was with Akaashi, right after I graduated! It was perfect—” 

“Of course, of course, you and Akaashi-kun ‘re soulmates, don’t rub it in our faces  
Bokkun.” Atsumu interrupted before he could continue. Which, to be fair, was the right choice. If they weren’t careful, Bokuto would wax poetic about Akaashi Keiji for hours, and it was nie impossible to stop him on a normal day. When he had even the slightest bit of alcohol and he got on a roll about how “beautiful and perfect Keiji’s eyes are, and his hands,” they’d have to wait until he passed out. 

“My first kiss was behind the bleachers after a game with Lucy Drakus,” Adriah sighed dramatically. “She was gorgeous, and we dated for about two weeks until she dumped me for a football player. I was heartbroken.” They all snickered a bit, even Sakusa. 

“Mine was in middle school, because of a bet.” Meian laughed. “My friend bet me I wouldn’t kiss this girl in our class, and I refused to back down. I kissed her on the cheek, and told her it was a bet, so she kissed me on the lips and we dated for a few months. She was nice.” 

Kiyoomi winced internally when he realized he was the only one who hadn’t shared. He’d successfully avoided conversation until this point, but had no idea how he’d get out of this one. 

“What about you, Omi-san? Where was your first kiss?” Hinata asked with all of his good natured charm. 

“Oh come on Shouyou, now yer just being mean. Obviously, Omi-kun here is completely pure.” Atsumu teased, smirking across the table. Kiyoomi sighed. 

“That’s true, is there a problem Miya?” Brutal honesty would hopeful get the other man to shut the fuck up. It was embarrassing, but worth it for the way Atsumu’s jaw snapped shut. Maybe he’d leave him alone for the rest of the evening. 

“Ah! Of course not Omi-san! There’s no rush, and you’ve obviously been preoccupied!” Hinata interfered, and quickly shifted the topic of conversation away from Sakusa. 

—————-  
“Goodnight Atsumu-san, Omi-san!” Hinata called as he headed to the bus stop with Meian and Adriah. Sakusa turned without sparing Atsumu a glance and began the short walk to his apartment building, unfortunately located directly next to Atsumu’s. 

“Ah, Omi-Omi, wait up!” Said annoyance called as he jogged to meet Kiyoomi’s long strides. Sakusa didn’t grace him with a response, although he spared a glance when he noticed Atsumu’s unusual silence and obvious fidgeting. He let out another long suffering sigh. 

“Out with it,” Sakusa gripes. He was barely holding onto his patience, what with Atsumu’s comments from earlier still grating on his nerves. Atsumu clears his throat, and scratches the back of his neck with a sheepish smile. 

“Guess I’m pretty obvious, huh?” He lets out a nervous laugh and clears his throat again. “I, uh, just want’d to apologize. For uh, earlier. I shouldn’t a’ made fun of ya for somethin’ like that, and I wasn’ tryin’ ta be rude. It’s not a big deal if ya never kissed anyone.” Kiyoomi was admittedly surprised. Atsumu was obviously trying to be sincere, something Sakusa wasn’t really used to from the overly relaxed setter. Atsumu was still rambling on, apparently just as unused to giving as genuine apology.

“Miya,” Sakusa cuts off. This was somehow more painful than dealing with Atsumu being an asshole, because at least he had nearly a decade of practice with that. “It’s alright. You couldn’t have known.” Atsumu rubs his forehead and turns to make eye contact with Sakusa, backlit from the warm yellow streetlamp that lined the sidewalk. 

“Still, I shouldn't a’ said anything. I really didn’ mean to make fun of yer germ problem, or anythin’. I know I’m ‘n asshole, but not about that. I really don’ wanna be rude about it.” He has a serious look on his face, like he needs Sakusa to understand that he’s being sincere. Sakusa needs to stop this before it travels too far into unknown territory. 

“I said it was fine. I accept your apology.” After a few seconds of blessed silence, Kiyoomi thinks he has successfully avoided another unwanted Human Interaction, but it seems he really has been unlucky today. 

“Is that why?” Atsumu asks, unusually quiet.

Sakusa glances over, then turns quickly back to the road ahead. He can’t believe he’s having this discussion with Miya Atsumu, of all people. He sighs, resigned to his fate and terrible luck for the night. Maybe if he just accepted it, it would reset tomorrow and he could go back to successfully avoiding connecting with other people. 

“Kind of. I mean, I’m not exactly friendly either. It’s not like people are flocking to try and be around me.” 

Atsumu made a noise, mumbling something unintelligible. Kiyoomi’s eye flicked over to him, but quickly turned back ahead. “Do ya want to?” Miya pressed. 

“I’ve thought about it, but at this point it’s probably too late.” He shrugged. He was trying to be casual over an issue he had actually spent nights agonizing over, and had no idea if he was achieving it. 

“I mean, who wants to enter into a relationship with a 24 year old who's never kissed anyone? It’s whatever. I’m fine with being alone.” He’d told himself this enough times that saying it outloud was second nature. Miya made another noise, and Kiyoomi rolled his eyes. It was true. That, in addition to his shitty personality and his mysophobia? He couldn’t imagine a person actually willing to deal with it all. Besides, he didn’t even like meeting new people. 

“It’s not a big deal, I’m perfectly comfortable as I am.” Another thing he’d spent hours convincing himself of when he couldn’t sleep. “It’s not like I’m desperately looking for someone to kiss me.” This, at least, was true, and he couldn’t keep the sneer off his face as he said it. It helped to dissipate some of the tension in the air that’d built up. “As long as I can play volleyball, I have no complaints.”

Miya’s face relaxed a bit, and he huffed in agreement. “Can’t say I disagree.” He grinned lazily, in the way that ensured he was about to say something disgusting. Or annoying. Or both. 

“But if ya are, I’m more than happy ta show ya the ropes. Just gimme a call,” and he winked (winked!) and walked away laughing. “Good talk, Omi-omi. Sleep tight.” 

And Sakusa was left in the fluorescent lighting of his apartment’s entrance, jaw dropped and cheeks red under his mask.  
_______  
What the fuck. What the actual fuck. It took Sakusa over a minute of standing and staring at the retreating form of Atsumu Miya before he was able to gather himself and enter his building. Even then, he was still in shock, and went through his usual post-outing cleaning routine manually. He was barely even able to enjoy it because he kept thinking of stupid fucking Atsumu Miya, who’d managed to extract nearly a full range of emotions out of Kiyoomi in the course of one evening. 

To be honest, he’d never expected Atsumu to feel so bad over his careless comment— he made enough of them on the daily that this seemed pretty minor. Nonetheless, he’d been genuine, and that alone had been enough to throw Sakusa off. Miya was never genuine off the court. In a game or in practice, he was free with praise for his teammates, caught up in the excitement of the sport. Off the court, however, he was a loud asshole. 

So, seeing him act so...soft was unsettling, to say the least. But, Kiyoomi could reconcile that. After all, in all the time they’d known each other Atsumu had never said anything malicious about his mysophobia. There were comments about his “freaky wrists,” his shitty personality, how standoffish he was, about how proper he acted compared to many of their overly energetic teammates, but never anything actually off color. To quote the man himself, he was an asshole, but not an asshole. 

They’d been having a moment, Sakusa could almost admit. Atsumu had been genuine, and Kiyoomi’d responded in kind to get that stupid guilty, sad look off his face. Then, Atsumu had to ruin it by saying something so incredibly dumb. And inappropriate. 

Sakusa, in an attempt to completely avoid thinking about it, grabbed his novel from his bedside table, but not even that could distract him. After a few minutes, he resigned himself to his fate and clicked off his bedside lamp. He’d sleep this off, and stop thinking about the idea of kissing Miya Atsumu by morning.


	2. Chapter 2

He hasn’t stopped thinking about it, though not for lack of trying. That night, he’d glared at his ceiling for several hours in a valiant attempt to think about anything besides Miya Atsumu’s lazy smirk before finally passing out from exhaustion. Luckily they had the next day off, or he’d have been noticeably off in practice. From sleep deprivation, not because he’d be staring at Miya. Nope, no fucking way. 

He’d spent the whole of his Saturday morning off scrubbing his apartment— bathrooms, kitchen, bedroom, living room. He would fight bad thoughts with good things, he’d decided. Because, yes, thinking about whether Miya Atsumu was a good kisser is absolutely a bad thought. A ridiculous thought. A disgusting thought— 

“God,” he said out loud into the silence of his now spotless apartment (as if it had been anything less than pristine before). He’d have to work harder to scrub his brain, apparently, from the infection that was Atsumu’s idiocy. Kiyoomi shed his gloves, disposed of them, and flopped on his black couch. His apartment was simple and modern. He didn’t have anything on the walls, or much at all beyond the bookshelf across from his kitchen to personalize it. The less things, the easier it was to keep clean. He’d have chosen a smaller apartment for the same reason, if he hadn’t required a second bathroom right next to the door. He refused to bring outside germs into his safe haven. His thoughts drifted again, wondering for a brief second if Miya’s apartment was more personalized, covered in stupid knick-knacks, posters, and pictures of him and his family. 

He groaned out loud again— that safe haven cleanliness should apply to thoughts as well, but alas. Today, his brain was out to get him and it didn’t seem like there was much he could do. He deigned to spend the rest of day burying himself in a book, valiantly escaping the world around him. He couldn’t think about Miya Atsumu ugly, heavy lidded gaze if he was too busy falling into the world of Oscar Wilde. Processing whatever the fuck Miya had done to his brain would be a problem for future Kiyoomi. 

Future Kiyoomi was extremely unhappy this task had been left up to him. He actively refused to make eye contact with anyone as they changed, but as they filed out of the locker room, he kept glancing over at Atsumu without realizing it. Warming up, he wondered what it would feel like. As they played a practice match, he wondered if Miya would be as precise in kissing as he was setting. Or would he act more like he did off the court— forceful, loud, and pushy, he wondered during spiking drills. Could kissing be loud? He had no fucking clue. 

“Omi-san, are you okay?” Hinata called from the other side of the net. “You look kind of red, are you sick?” Sakusa’s face flushed a bit more in the bright fluorescent lighting of the gym. Fuck. 

“Ah, I’m fine. I think I’m just a bit overheated.” Seriously, fuck him. At least he wasn’t missing any spikes or struggling noticeably. He definitely cared about volleyball too much to let some useless brainworm ruin practice. 

“Get some water!” Hinata, who had been diligently receiving his spikes, moved under the net and toward the bench, motioning him to come along, taking Sakusa’s excuse for face value. He followed his teammate, and took a few deep breaths. Obviously, this wasn’t a problem that was going to just...disappear like he’d hoped. But, he wasn’t an idiot. He wasn’t stupid like Miya fucking Atsumu. He was a professional volleyball player, former university MVP and top three spiker in the nation. 

Their team was good this year, and he wasn’t going to fuck it up because of some off hand comment by notorious idiot and resident asshole. He took another deep breath. This could be considered exposure therapy— he hadn’t seen Atsumu since Friday, and was still in shock. Besides, he’d been acting strangely considerate, and Kiyoomi couldn’t help but remember that. Once he saw Atsumu acting like his normal, asshole self, he’d be able to move on from the stupid image of kissing him. And, maybe remind himself how many germs the human mouth carries. 

“Thank you, Hinata. Let’s go again.” Sakusa steeled himself. He’d finish his spiking drills, play another practice match, and lift in the weightroom until his arms gave out. Right now was time to be a serious professional athlete and not the main character of some stupid shoujo manga Miya Atsumu probably read. 

Part of his plan to Stop Thinking About Kissing was to remind himself how disgusting people were. And, by extension, how disgusting Atsumu is. While bench pressing, he glanced over at Miya and Bokuto having a squat competition. They were both sweaty, of course. As they switched, they didn’t even wipe down the bar. Miya’s lips were dry and slightly cracked as laughed loudly at some comment Bokuto made. 

He mentally patted himself on the back as he thought “how would he be nice to kiss?” His lips are dry, and he wouldn’t be able to shut up long enough to actually do it. Unfortunately for him, right as he was glancing over again, Atsumu licked his lips as he settled himself underneath the bar. Sakusa averted his gaze immediately, face already flushed again. 

“Omi-san, are you overheating again?” Hinata asked as he prepared to spot him for his next press. “You must be dehydrated today!” He had a look on his face like he knew something he shouldn’t, and Sakusa grimaced. 

“Must be,” he muttered, slipping out from under the bar and standing up to spot his teammate. Hinata gave him a knowing look, but said nothing else as he changed the weights and switched positions. For what it’s worth, Sakusa did down half of his water bottle before turning his back toward Bokuto and Atsumu and focusing only on Hinata. Who may soon lose his designation as one of the only teammates Sakusa could stand if he didn’t shut the fuck up.

Kiyoomi hurried to the locker room the moment his workout was done, which was not actually that unusual. His teammates had, for the most part, been incredibly easy going about his need to shower first. He still had to wipe down the handle, and wore shower shoes (of course), but showering before his teammates helped alleviate some of his anxiety. Today, however, he planned to be out of the locker room before anyone (ie Hinata or Miya) had the opportunity to talk to him. Miya, for obvious reasons, and Hinata because he was, somehow, incredibly perceptive. 

On one hand, this meant he had understood Kiyoomi’s social landscape quickly and without a single word from the man himself when he joined the team. For this, he had a lot of respect and gratitude for his shorter teammate. However, it also meant that he might have an inkling to Sakusa’s current predicament. He’d caught him staring at Atsumu twice today, and Hinata was an idiot, but he wasn’t stupid. He might come to the completely incorrect conclusion that Kiyoomi had a crush on Atsumu, instead of the correct one. That being, that Atsumu had brainwashed him. 

Practice had gone similarly all week. His performance on the court was fine, but he had been careful to arrive as late as possible and leave as early as he could. Thankfully, working with Atsumu on the court was not much different. As annoying as he was, the man was an incredibly good setter, and they hadn’t struggled to match since he’d joined the team. 

It wasn’t unusual for him to be more standoffish than the rest of the rambunctious team, but even he knew that he’d have to deal with this at some point. It’d been a week, and he’d been fine. He had barely looked at Atsumu outside of their games, hadn’t partnered up with him in drills, and had been doing fine because of it. 

But, he hadn’t had more than a perfunctory conversation with the team in days. He hadn’t done anything embarrassing, but even he knew that he couldn’t be too cold to his teammates without arousing suspicion. So, when Hinata and Bokuto bounded up to him the moment they finished their drills that Friday, he accepted their invitation to the izakaya with a slight nod. Wincing at their loud cheers, he completely missed the stare boring into the back of his head. 

Exposure therapy, he reminded himself. That’s what this was. A reminder to himself that seeing Atsumu behave like the absolute buffoon he always was the only cure for his current suffering. As long as Atsumu behaved normally, he’d realize how disgusting his recent obsessive thoughts were. That’s he was carefully seating himself at the far end of a table in the same dim izakaya they’d all been at a week ago.

Of course, his plan didn’t include the man himself practically shoving Hinata out of the way to take a seat next to him. Nor did it include the intense look Atsumu shot him, as if he could read his mind if he just stared enough. Kiyoomi broke eye contact quickly, and grimaced under his black mask, staring instead at the table, still a little damp from where’d wiped it down.

“Omi-kun,” Atsumu drawled, too close. He could almost feel his breath on his neck, head resolutely turned away. “You’ve been avoid’n me all week. What’s yer problem?”

Sakusa scoffed. “I don’t know if you’re arrogant or just stupid. I’ve been busy, is all. If you looked, it’s not like I’m going out to get drinks with everyone except you.” He turned to give his teammate a withering glare, only to be shocked by a somewhat sincere expression. 

“So yer not still mad about last Friday? I know I stuck my foot in my mouth and I really do feel bad!” Sakusa blinked dumbly for a second. Did Atsumu not realize what he’d been agonizing about was his offer after all? “I know I apologized already, but just tell me if there’s something I need to do ta make it up to ya, alright?” 

Oh. Oh. Sakusa grimaced again, feeling a bit guilty. Of course Miya had forgotten about his teasing comment the moment it left his brain— he made so many overly flirtatious comments to his teammates in jest on the daily, he certainly wouldn’t remember the one that had been plaguing Kiyoomi for days. He sighed, grappling to fix the situation. 

“No, I told you already I don’t care. I had things to do this week. Besides, you’ve known me how long now? Sometimes people are just too much.” He looked down at his glass of water, speaking quietly so as not to disturb their other teammates’ discussions. 

“Is it another….er….misophobia thing? Or whatever it’s called?” Atsumu looked curious again, even earnest, and although this was actually the opposite of his original exposure therapy plan, it was an improvement over the guilty, sad countenance he’d had on mere seconds before. Besides, he wasn’t entirely wrong. This week, his phobia hadn’t been the cause of careful avoidance, but it often was. It was also an ideal excuse. 

“Mysophobia. And yes, sometimes certain things are more unbearable than usual. There are days when crowds don’t phase as much and days when I can’t bear the thought of going to the grocery store.” It’s not like it was a lie, although he couldn’t explain why he was explaining to Miya. Again, this was not a part of his plan. 

“That makes sense, I guess. Good days and bad days are for everythin’ I suppose. I’m just glad yer not mad.” 

“I suppose. And, if I was angry, you’d know, so don’t worry so much” Sakusa pulled his mask down to take a drink, and gave the other man a small smile. Atsumu’s face went blank for several seconds. As Sakusa turned away to put his glass down and pull his mask back up, his teammates entire face flushed. 

“Atsumu-san, you’re really red! Have you had that much to drink already?” Hinata giggled from the next seat over. “We haven’t even been here a half hour!”

“Shut it Shouyou-kun, I have not!” And just like that, the quiet atmosphere their conversation had created disappeared under the intensity of their boisterous team. Atsumu grabbed Hinata’s head under his arm and started rubbing it, both of them laughing too loud to be considered polite in a public setting. As Atsumu laughed under the warm, flickering izakaya lights, Sakusa couldn’t help but glance at his lips again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone! Sorry this took longer than the week I planned to get out. My roommates boyfriend broke up with her and I was on friendship duty-- serious business. But, she's doing better, and I managed to finish this. I am excited for the future chapter, as I have some really fun stuff planned out! Kudos and comments are welcome, and honestly make it a lot easier to keep writing. Constructive criticism is always welcome as I don't have a beta! 
> 
> Come talk to me about Haikyuu on my [twitter! ](https://twitter.com/ninjashouyou2)


	4. Pretending Your Teammate isn't Charming is Also Inherently Homosexual

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Moves are being made. Or at least thought of.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my god, I am so sorry for how long this chapter took. I have an unfortunately weak constitution, and spent a few weeks sick and with a horrendous headache that didn't let me think about being productive. (Somehow, every shoujo heroine with a weak constitution makes it look soo romantic. It's not, unfortunately and I feel cheated). After I recovered, I had horrible writers block. BUT, I feel like I'm back. I am feeling much better, and hopefully will go some time without getting sick again! Again, feel free to message me on twitter @ninjashouyou2 ! I'm delighted to chat Haikyuu or other, and hear any constructive criticism! 
> 
> Thanks so much for reading and replying All the nice comments really made it easier to write this chapter, and push past my writers block. You're all so nice :)

Sakusa had walked back with Atsumu that night, although the setter had spent all but the first few minutes on a phone call with his brother. From what he could overhear, the twins would be visiting their mother to help with something and Osamu only had the chance to call late that Friday when he'd closed his store. Sakusa walked next to him quietly, shivering in the winter chill, and waved his goodby as they parted. That night had been almost entirely normal, with Atsumu being as loud and rambunctious as usual. Pardon the 

But, his legitimate worry about Sakusa's comfort had again come as a surprise. Even a day later he couldn't help but feel slightly guilty about his weeklong avoidance. He was aggravated at himself, and at Atsumu for invading his thoughts so thoroughly. Sakusa sighed from his place on his couch. It'd been over a week and his brain refused him a break. 

"Well, exposure therapy takes time," He muttered to himself. He had gone through it long enough to be certain of that. Of course, his previous experiences had been guided by a therapist and much more...clinical in nature, he was certain he could at least guide himself through the basics. Luckily, he had to interact with the man nearly every day. He couldn't avoid him like he'd done previously, or he'd certainly arouse suspicion. 

Instead, Kiyoomi would force himself to interact with Miya as he'd always done before. It isn't as if the man had suddenly become less annoying. Or less loud. Or less disgusting, at the minimum in the way all people were naturally disgusting. Kiyoomi would be fine. He nodded once resolutely to himself before going about his day. 

\----

Of course, Kiyoomi's plan hadn't included Atsumu suddenly trying to act like they were long time friends. Apparently, their two more personal discussions were permission for him to bother Kiyoomi twice as much as he had before. 

"Hey Omi-omi! Be my partner, will ya?" Atsumu called as he entered the gym. "We gotta do more intense partner stretches today."

This was new-- apparently there had been an injury in the league and their coach was paranoid, demanding they spend more time stretching out before practice to help prevent injuries. For Sakusa, it felt useless, as he already stretched more than the other MBSY jackles to support his strange joints. He grimaced without really thinking about it, and saw Miya give him a little wince back. 

"I know ya hate touchin' other people, sorry." He walked over, and then lit up. "Oh! I washed my hands before comin' out here, but do ya have any sanitizer I could use? That'd help, right?" 

Sakusa stared dumbly for a few seconds before nodding. He reached into the black gym bag on his shoulder and tossed Atsumu the small bottle, watching intensely as he carefully rubbed the gel across his hands and through the webs of his fingers. Sakusa took a deep breath and willed his cheeks to calm down, though he was still a little flustered when Atsumu tossed the bottle back with a grin. 

Sakusa took another steadying breath as he put his sanitizer away. He was quiet for a few moments as he was led to the corner Atsumu had procured for their warmup. As they set down to begin, he looked at Atsumu, who'd gone on as if nothing had happened. 

"Miya," he called quietly, looking his teammate in the eyes. "Thank you." For once, the one staring blankly was not him, and Sakusa's eyes widened as Atsumu's cheeks lit up red, and he sputtered for a few seconds. 

"C-careful there Omi-omi, or I'll start ta think ya can actually stand me!" Sakusa rolled his eyes, and moved to begin the assisted stretching. 

"Stop wasting time, Miya. We're behind," He said dryly, turning to hide, refusing to admit to his smirk.

————

Practice went fine. Personal lamenting aside, he cherished the way volleyball shut off his brain. The obsessiveness, the squeamishness, the discomfort that threaded itself through his life faded into the background during a hard practice or a grueling game. He did go professional for a reason, after all. 

Today was an especially good practice, with three full practice sets against his teammates-- maybe extra stretching was a good idea.Everyone was at the best through all, and it was neck and neck-- Kiyoomi's team won with a setup from Atsumu and spike from him. Volleyball was a team sport, but scoring the winning point would never not be a personal accomplishment.

He allowed himself a moment to gloat as Coach Foster debriefed their games, the whole team panting as they gathered around. 

"Sakusa--good job. You and Atsumu have really got a good rapport going these days, keep it up." 

Of course, now practice was over. Atsumu turned flashed a grin at him from the across the group, and he willed himself not to flush. 

"Look at us, Omi! All our bonding has been payin' off, yeah?" He called as they headed to the locker rooms. 

Both the grimace and the pointed "disgusting" were completely involuntary. So was the heat climbing up his neck. 

"Awh, don't gimme that! I used yer hand sanitizer and everything!" Atsumu cackled as he pushed through the locker room door behind Sakusa, who scoffed loudly. 

"Hours ago, after three full sets. We're all disgusting, Atsumu. Go take a shower." 

The team filing in around them laughed at their antics as they got began their individual post practice routines. Kiyoomi himself cleaned himself completely, but without luxerierating, knowing he'd be taking a longer shower when he got home.

"Hey, hey Omi-san!" Hinata called as, ruffling a towel over his head. Kiyoomi winced. For a brief moment, he wondered if Hinata would ever consider actually taking care of his curls instead of ripping a brush or towel through them. 

"Hm?" He eyed Hinata as he pulled on his simple black joggers and hoodie, and began to lace up his shoes. 

"After morning practice tomorrow, do you want to visit a cafe with Bokuto-san, Atsumu-san and I? It just opened up down the street and it looks so nice!"

Kiyoomi paused. This was something of a divergence in their usual "bonding" activities. He was aware that Hinata and Bokuto spent time together outside of practice-- they'd been friends long before either had joined the team. It didn't seem unusual for Atsumu to join, either. He seemed close enough with the other two of the monster generation. However, he himself had never been invited to hang out with them without the rest of the team. And, team bonding had historically included an izakaya, alcohol, and, well, the entire team. It had never occurred during the day, either, with the team preferring the spend their free afternoons with significant others or doing necessary errands. 

Or at least, necessary errands was how Sakusa spent his practice free afternoons. He honestly had no idea what the others did. This was certainly a change to the norm, but he didn't have a reason to refuse. Perhaps his recent willingness to attend team bonding had Hinata attempting to include him with the other teammates his age. He didn't have an especially good reason to refuse, either. 

"Ah, sure. That sounds...fine." He winced a bit, but figured Hinata would understand. He had thus far not been dissuaded by Kiyoomi's prickly outside yet, and had been nothing but kind. Besides, he could always bail with an excuse of some sort of errand if necessary. 

"Great!" Hinata gave him a toothy grin, a wave, and then headed out. "I'll see you tomorrow!" 

Kiyoomi nodded, and prepared to head out himself. 

"See ya tomorrow, Omi-omi." Atsumu called as walked past him toward the door to the parking lot. He threw a hand up over his shoulder and refused to make eye contact with what he knew was some aggravating smirk. 

\----

He didn't think much about the invitation that night, or the next morning before practice. Besides the perfunctory gathering of more presentable clothes that wouldn't wrinkle, he didn't didn't spare much thought. He assumed it would be a slightly more intimate version of the usual team dining experiences. So, when practice ended, he wasn't worried-- simply showering, and taking the time to thoroughly clean himself, knowing his second shower would be delayed. He scrunched his hair dry (he had a very solid curly hair routine, naturally), dried off, and slipped into a pair of dark jeans and a black turtleneck. 

Kiyoomi wouldn't say he was a fan of jeans, per say, but they did get points for never wrinkling in his duffle bag. The turtleneck had been chosen for much the same reason. 

"Hinata," he called to his teammate, again torturing his hair with a rough towel dry, "I'll wait outside." Grabbing his duffle and throwing on his black jacket, he walked outside into the chill air. It was a few moments of leaning against the brick outside the gym until he heard the door open, displaying a fresh faced Atsumu. 

"Geez, Omi! How do'ya just stand out here with yer hair all wet when it's this cold!" He grumbled, though for his part he was only wearing a hoodie with a denim jacket over it, tossed over a pair of joggers. 

"You can't complain when you're not even wearing a coat. Besides, I didn't expect Hinata and Bokuto to take so long." It's not like either of them tend to spend a lot of time on their appearance on even a non practice day. In fact, he could be fairly certain that he and Atsumu spend considerably more time in their routines then their chaotic teammates. 

Atsumu nodded, and just opened his mouth to agree with assessment, said chaos due burst through the back door, looking slightly rushed and more than a little frazzled. 

"Omi-san, Atsumu-san! I'm so sorry, something came up, I have to-" He was interrupted by Bokuto 

"Kaashi called, he needs me to bring him--" Neither one was truly understandable, talking over each other as they made their excuses. 

"Anyways, we have to go! You two should still go though, it's a really nice cafe, just down the street on the left!" Hinata pointed as he and Bokuto rushed off to do who knows what. 

Kiyoomi and Atsumu were alone left in the cold, staring at their teammates in shock. 

"What...just happened?" Kiyoomi muttered. They were both obviously lying. Neither Hinata or Bokuto were considerably subtle. 

"I think we just got ditched. For what, I have no fuckin' clue." Atsumu laughed awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck. He looked nearly as flustered as the other two. He was steadily avoiding eye contact. "Uh, but since we're both here, do ya wanna grab something to eat?" 

"You want to go to some fancy cafe that Hinata found on instagram?" Kiyoomi couldn't help but raise an eyebrow. The mask around his neck made his disbelief visible. Then, the unthinkable. Miya Atsumu actually flushed. It was slight, a darkening of his cheeks over the already pink from the cold skin, but nonetheless there. Kiyoomi was shocked. And maybe a little delighted, but that would have to be unpacked later. 

"Ah, well, not really." He chuckled again, and was still rubbing the back of his neck. He looked unfairly attractive, and Kiyoomi would have to cut off that line of thinking all of immediately. "But my brother's place isn't too far, if ya wanna go? They got more than just onigiri, since I know ya don't wanna eat food someone else has touched." 

Sakusa stared. There was a moment of brief silence as he looked at Atsumu, still steadily refusing eye contact, before he sighed. 

"Well, I suppose I'm already ready. Why not." 

Atsumu's face brightened immediately, and finally looked him in the eye. 

"Really, ya want to?" It was Sakusa's turn to look away, Atsumu's face stupidly ernest. 

"Sure, why not. I'm sure I can cajole your brother into telling me more embarrassing stories about you." 

"Hey! Samu's a liar, ya. can't believe anything he says okay? He's out to get me!" They started walking toward Onigiri Miya, and Kiyoomi couldn't quite suppress the thought that this felt just a little like a date.

**Author's Note:**

> Whew here we GO! I have no idea how long this will be, but probably somewhere between 10,000 and 15,000? I'm terrible at estimating that, but I've got it mostly planned out. Sakusa's thoughts are largely based on me, who is 21 and has not had me first kiss lol, and inspired by a comment from a twitter mutual.  
> If there are any grammar mistakes, or you have any comments, feel free to comment or message me on Twitter! Or, come message me if you just wanna talk about Haikyuu brainrot C:


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